makemeasong | Open post/meme overflow 💫

I'm not a fan of those endings either. I tend to skip those pages.

[Or tear them out entirely. Some things never change.

She's trying not to stare, but it's hard really. For all the talk of see-you-laters instead of goodbyes, she really had expected to never lay eyes on Clara again. How nice it is to be wrong in this case, to actually see her again.]

I think he'd have understood though. It's nice to know where you're headed sometimes, yeah? As long as you don't let it get in the way of the journey. That's the best part, even after it's over. And an ending can't take that away, no matter how hard it tries.

[Even when it tries to steal away memories and erase all traces.]

[ Now, Clara has to turn, looking at the woman beside her. It isn't just that the words remind her of the Doctor. She wants to stop staring at the lights, trying not to think about a phone call and what she should've said but didn't. There was no goodbye then, either, just two words.

Miss ya.

They've come so far, but she still misses him. And she misses the him she was last with, too. But she can distract herself with meeting someone new. A cute someone new, to boot. ]

Very wise words. [ She glances up at the neon. ] Feels a bit silly, to have something I know wouldn't help show up in lights like that. Especially with some of the others, mine's downright pedestrian.

I have my moments, every century or so.

[She answers with a smile and a shrug of her shoulder. But she's quick to shake her head at what Clara says next.]

It's not silly. It's human. Very human. And that is a compliment, Clara Oswald, in case you were wondering.

[She doesn't always mean it as a compliment, mind, but this time she genuinely does.]

[ Everything suddenly comes to a grinding halt for multiple reasons. First, the comment about centuries. Then, about her being human. And finally, when Clara already has a pile of circumstantial evidence pointing her in a direction her mind doesn't want to go, her full name.

Only one person in all the universe calls her by her full name, and now her attention is completely focused on the person in front of her. Peering closer, she looks right into a pair of lovely, ancient eyes, and that's how she knows, it's how she'd always know: those sad eyes.

Her voice is barely a whisper when she speaks again, sparkler and words forgotten. ]

...Doctor?

[Clara always was clever, sometimes too clever for her own good. Something in the Doctor's face softens when Clara peers at her like that, looking at her with that knowing gaze that's always been deep and dark enough to fall straight into.

She sees the flicker of recognition there, and she nods when the question is finally spoken.]

Hello Clara.

[ There's a white noise buzzing in Clara's head as her eyes widen in shock and her hands cover her mouth. If the Doctor's regenerated then that means something awful's happened. Was she there again, did she help? She knows she can't travel with the Doctor forever, but how long was it, exactly?

Opening her mouth to say something, nothing actually comes out and so she closes her mouth and swallows instead, trying again. ]

Still not a ginger.

[ It's the only thing she can think to say when she drops her hands, tears blurring her vision. There's so much to unpack, and she doesn't want to think about what made the Doctor regenerate. Not yet. ]

And it's tragic, isn't it?

[All she is saying here is she would look great with red hair. But her expression subdues after this. She can see the tears gathering in those eyes, and it tears at something inside her. She never liked seeing Clara hurt.

She steps forward to wrap the other woman into a hug. She's a hugger this time, Clara.]

It's good to see you again. It's... been a while.

[ Arms winding around the Doctor's frame (still lanky, always lanky), her face presses against her shoulder. Eyes closing, Clara breathes in and it's still there, that faint scent of the air before a storm, the smell of stardust. She's so relieved that her arms tighten in one of the fiercest hugs she's ever given. ]

How long?

[ She isn't sure if that's a fair question, but 'it's been a while' could mean anything to a Time Lord. ]

[The Doctor holds her just as tightly. She's lost so many people to so many different fates and paths that tore them from her life. Having this chance to see Clara again is a gift, one she's not entirely certain she deserves.]

A few decades.

[Too long. And somehow in the scheme of things, barely any time at all.] When are you from?

[She could puzzle it out if she needed to, a scan of her sonic, a glance at Clara's hair, at the tears in those big dark eyes. But she doesn't want to treat the other woman like a puzzle right now, and hse also doesn't want to let her go.]

[ Decades. That word tumbles around in her head, wondering what it was that made them stop traveling together. Clara living her life? A falling out? She hopes it isn't that one, she isn't sure she could stand it. She also knows she can't ask, unwilling to make the Doctor toe a line. Because she knows she could ask for anything and she's sure the Doctor would try to make it happen.

Instead, she reaches out with one hand to press right between the Doctor's hearts since she's apparently allowed to touch without asking again. She's always been so tactile; even as close as they've gotten after the moon, it was still difficult not being able to reach out and touch him anytime she wanted. ]

Missy.

[ Clara sighs heavily; she's only annoyed by the other woman's antics for now because she hasn't yet seen the inside of a Dalek. ]

We were on Skaro.

[Frankly the Doctor misses Missy in comparison to the version of the Master she's interacted with most recently. But what she does not miss is how she'd had to part from Clara, the jumbled mess of memories lost and found. The pain and deep sense of failure at not being able to save her from her death, not being able to properly protect her.

She meant what she'd said early. She hates goodbyes, and she's had far too many of them in all her years.]

The Scottish days. I do miss being able to reach things.

[Her own hand comes to set against the one Clara has at her chest. Very allowed to touch. Whatever part of her last regeneration that had recoiled so much from it was lost in the change.]

[ That draws a laugh from Clara. It's watery but full of warmth. ]

Now you know how I felt. You always put the good stuff up high.

[ She's quiet, unsure if she should ask many questions. Silently, she's trying to turn them all over in her head with more care than she thinks she's ever taken, at least Trenzelore, when she'd had to watch her Doctor (hers no matter the face, even if that's more than a little possessive) grow old. ]

Was I with you this time too, when you—[ She falters, tripping up over the word before clearing her throat. ]—when you regenerated?

[ It's a safer question than how? or why?, even if she won't be able to stop thinking about it until she knows. ]

[She nods, ruefully.] Still probably up there.

[But she's glad for the laugh, teary as it might be.

This incarnation of the Doctor isn't any better at answering questions than her predecessors. She deflects and distracts, dancing away from uncomfortable truths, not wanting to heap any of the burdens that she carries on the people who already risk so much to travel with her.

But this is Clara, Clara who has given her so much, risked so much, lost so much. She shakes her head.]

No, not this time. It was a bit of a mess, honestly, mostly of my own making. I'm sure this is a shock, but I was being very stubborn at the time.

[She still is, who is she kidding?] You were... traveling yourself. I can't tell you your own future, that never ends well. I wish I could. [And oh she would change it if she could. Hell, he'd tried, and Clara herself had been brave enough to put a stop to it.

She can't help but reach her free hand out, hand setting at Clara's cheek, expression achingly fond.] My impossible girl.

[ Only now does Clara pull back to look up at the Doctor, a part of her heart twisting to know she wasn't there. Even if maybe she wasn't needed, if she'd been asked to go and live her life, she'd always rather be there. Especially now that she knows how the hell it works. ]

Typical you. Always did get into trouble without me.

[ There's a hint of a smile there as she looks, instead of up, directly into the Doctor's eyes. That's new, and her smile grows just a touch. ]

Miss me?

Absolute rubbish on my own, yeah.

[She lets her hands fall away now that Clara has leaned back, but the smile on her face lingers. Like it could go anywhere when she has this chance.]

Oh you know, a little. Here and there. [A flicker of mischief in her smile before she grows a shade more serious.] Every day since I saw you last. Every day I've still got coming.

I can't believe you let me go on about goodbyes that way.

[ It's on the tip of her tongue, why did you leave me?, because she knows, she knew it when the Doctor pleaded with her, that she'd travel as long as she possibly could. And so, before he even regenerated, he would've had to make her go. It doesn't even cross her mind that something could have happened to her.

At the Doctor's words and the look on her face, Clara swallows thickly, vision blurring yet again. ]

I know I miss you just as much, wherever I'm traveling in the world. I think I'd always listen for that sound of the TARDIS.

[ She blinks to try and drive away her tears, and when she does, a tear gone rogue drips its way down the apple of her cheek. ]

Started to think of it as the sound that means it's time to come home.

In my defense, the writing was on the wall. Or well, the not-wall. Mid-air.

[And she'd been a little stunned to find herself looking at Clara Oswald standing in front of her alive and human and here, not on the inevitable course to a death that she couldn't prevent.]

In the universe. [She corrects quietly, and for saying she couldn't tell the other woman her future, she certainly is saying something.

The sight of that tear has her chest tightening, too tight for both hearts to properly beat. She's quick to reach up, brush the back of a knuckle against that cheek to wipe away the tear that escaped.

There are tears threatening in her own eyes, even if she's still smiling. There's an ache to the expression.]

Clara... [There are too many words to say and somehow the only ones that make it out are a quiet.] I'm sorry.

[ It surprises her to hear; she isn't wandering Earth and finding all the hidden nooks and crannies. No, she's out in the universe somehow, some way, without the Doctor. Her brow creases in confusion, and it stays that way when the Doctor begins apologizing.

The touch is familiar, even so many years removed. The warmth of her hand is still the same, and it's all Clara can do not to press her cheek into the touch. Her stomach is too busy twisting in apprehension, but her voice is soft. ]

Why? Why are you sorry, Doctor?

Because if it were up to me, the TARDIS would have always been your home, as long as you wanted it. But there are some things I can't change, as much as I want... wanted... to.

[She's lost too many people, and all of them had hurt. Some had left scars so deep that no number of regenerations would ever smooth them over. Clara Oswald is one of those. Scattered through her timeline, with her through and end and a beginning and so much more.]

[ There's something niggling at the back of Clara's mind, but she doesn't want to question it. The Doctor can't tell her and she isn't sure if she wants to know anyway. ]

I know that whatever it is, if you wanted me with you and I couldn't be, then you tried. You always try, I know you do, but I like that I'm out there with the stars. And here we are again, together. You got the timing a bit off, but when don't you?

[ She laughs, teasing, and reaches out for another hug. She's still lingering when a thought occurs to her. ]

It'd be brilliant if you said the TARDIS was here.

[She tried. She caused an absurd amount of trouble with the trying, but she'd try again if given the chance. Again and again.]

Timing's off, but the company couldn't be better. So I'm not complaining.

[The Doctor is happy to wrap Clara back into another hug. And it's her turn to allow the start of a teasing grin tug its way over her lips.]

It would be, right? Brilliant. Convenient.

[And since this thread got snatched away from a TDM and the same rules no longer have to apply.] She is, but she's not happy about it. She's a little... grounded.

[Not entirely grounded. But whatever snatched them here isn't letting the TARDIS do more than make short hops from place to place. Locked into the timeline and not able to leave the general area.]

[ The TARDIS is a safe haven, no matter where they are. No one else in or out—that feels better than whatever's going on where they landed. ]

Lucky she managed to land the one place in the universe I happen to be.

[ Clara pulls back and her smile reaches her eyes, somehow able to make brown sparkle in the twilight. ]

Come on, then. It's been ages since you saw me last. [ Reaching out for her hand, Clara smiles again, hopefully. ]

Take me home.

[Luck isn't really something the Doctor is willing to believe in. Coincidences are usually just coincidences. Unless they're not. But with the size of the cosmos and the natural inclination of the TARDIS to avoid crossing timelines that shouldn't be crossed, it's hard to think that Clara and her both being here in this moment, to meet again, that feels bigger than any coincidence should be.

She should be suspicious about it, maybe, but she'll save that for later. It isn't nearly as important as reaching out to wrap her hand around Clara's, not bothering to hide the way her smile warms at those words. Take me home.

Yeah, that sounds right.]

Right then. Let's go. It's not far.

[It isn't. The TARDIS is currently tucked in a copse of trees -- not the best hiding spot for a blue police box, but at least it's not starkly out in the open -- and as it comes into view, the Doctor gestures with her free hand.] Tada.

[ Clara expected it to feel different, her hand in the Doctor's. And it does, her skin is soft, her hands are smaller. But the warmth and the way Clara feels when they're connected is the same: sure, safe, and like always, wanted.

It isn't as if she's been separated from the TARDIS long, but it still feels good to see her again, a relief. Just like the Doctor is a relief to see in this place. Everything will be alright now.

Laughing softly, Clara only lets go of the Doctor's hand to dig in her pocket and pull out her key. ]

Didn't change the locks on me did you?

[ Her eyes dance because she already knows the answer, and she moves to the door, looking over her shoulder for persmission. ]

[The Doctor releases her, only lifting an eyebrow at the question. As if she would. No, that key would always open this door, in case whatever forces of chance and fate and other mysterious workings in the universe ever brought Clara Oswald back to her door.

Which, she supposes, they have.

So she hangs back, ducking her head in a quick nod of 'go ahead' as she watches Clara let herself in.]

We did do a little redecorating. [Well the TARDIS had, specifically.]

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to bed with me, but I'll be around tomorrow!

sleep sweet! :D I'll be around and about tomorrow as well.

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